this is my unsuccessful post on friday due to terrible internet connection.

i absolutely give up.
i give up, im not faking anymore.
what i say and feel is real, so stop trying to rub salt in my wound.
im not like you, so don't keep saying that.
i am who i am, and whether you like it or not,
just suck it.

its pointless being someone who you want everyone to love cause thats not you.
i realised that now.
everyone has that special something, its up to you to find it and bloom in that area.
i look at you and think, hmm.
you're empty.
i hope someone learns to fill it soon or just be swallowed up in your own hole.

and no, im not going to talk about anyone anymore.
im going to be neutral.
pretend nothing's going on,
emotionless to the destruction around me,
blind to those who wants to hurt me constantly.
my heart will only be open to those who are worth the trouble and effort.
if not, just screw it.

i gave you one chance, you pushed it away.
i gave you many chances, you take it for granted.
so yeah, no more chances, cause i'll never believe in you ever again.

and oh crap.
i just realised i promise never to blog abt you ever again.
looks like i need to rethink about letting you ruin my mood.
cause you don't deserve it. no you don't.
btw, stop wallowing in self pity cause its absolutely disgusting.
glad that you realise how people around you feel too.
im really happy for you.

from here on, im gonna make new friends again.

im seriously fishballed up now.
cause my dearest cousins are totally screwing my day.
what a pair of annoying brats.
and they're staying til thursday.
oh great, there goes my weekends and days too.
what an alien.
living in this hellhole sure sucks alot.
i bet those two babies know im pissed at them too.
HAHAHA! must be my awesome black face at work!
ah crap, now im feeling shit and guilty.
can't stay mad at small kids for long.
sigh, i really love my life alot! yeah alot.

i went to the zoo on tuesday!
one emoticon for it.
(((((((((((:
i had a wonderful elephant time with you guys.
thank you!

on wed, it was recee to jalan bahtera.
people, tell me if you want the photos to show to the instructors kay?
i'll post it.
idk why, but i felt
:DDDDDDDDDDDDDD
on that day.
ohwell, proves how dumb ive been the past few weeks.
i need to be less sensitive from now on.

thursday was ________________________.
fill in the blanks with all words that have the meaning of boring.
it was tuition, study, violin, study.
URGH.

i went to the dentist today!!woohoo!
im gonna put braces! woohoo!
i may not need extraction (and hopefully not)! woohoo!
my first 2 colours for my braces will be pink and silver! woohoo!
my bro and i burnt a hole in my mum's pocket! woohoo!
i did moulding and x ray for my teeth today! woohoo!
but i'll only get to put them on on the 26th! boohoo!
cause the dentist going on holiday and it clashes with my schedule! boohoo!
but thats not really the point! the point is that im still gonna put on my braces sooooo
WOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO!
im not spoilt, no im not!

i need someone to follow me on a shopping spree, and study dates are welcomed too!
WHEEEEEEEE!
funny how my mood can change so quickly.
im glad i have learnt to let go.


i'll always wonder whats
(: